Madeline Albright: Secretary of Sexiness

Allure magazine was about the last fashion magazine my wife could read without having her politics insulted (in the context of, say, an article on the new capitalist fall eye shadows). In the October 2005 issue, though, Allure jumps into the political fray with its "Year in Beauty" wrap-up, with a photo of Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and the tasteful heading, "Cracking the Whip":

A United States secretary of state must display subtlety, flexibility, and clarity, but most of all...power. For women, it can be especially complex. Madeline Albright did it with a motherly, sometimes flirtatious manner than thinly concealed this subtext: After exhausting all diplomatic options, she would personally snap your neck like a twig [between her thighs, perhaps? - Ed.]. Our current secretary of state...seems to be wearing a helmet. Her much-parodied, armor-plated hair flip is visual shorthand for the administration: straightlaced, rigid, and impenetrable--even in jest.

You read that right, so I guess I'll be seeing y'all right back here next time you Google "Madeline Albright" AND flirtatious. Who's the motherly diplomat who's snappin' all the boys necks? MADELINE! Damn right.


Madam Albright - Her milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.