Rock the Vote: Still Rocking ... Barely

The nonpartisan folks at Rock the Vote shore do love them there online polls. If you didn't like the results of the last one, you can post a new one two months later.

RTV, now in an unholy alliance with AARP to battle the greater foe Bushitler, is encouraging its members to share their views on Social Security, the most important issue facing young people at least for the next five minutes. Six months ago Rock the Vote seemed to think spreading rumors about the return of the draft was the most important issue, followed closely by the release date of the new Black Eyed Peas album.

Funny, though -- I think the new poll is broken, 'cause some choices were missing from Question No. 1:

Which of the following issues do you think should be the highest priority for Congress and the President this year?

(Please select up to TWO issues)

The budget deficit

Social Security

Health care

Education

Jobs and the economy

Reducing taxes

Not sure

For the integrity of the poll I had to leave that one blank; I'm not sure if the War on Terror fits under "heath care" or "not sure."

Other winning questions: Would you say that George W. Bush has provided young people with an accurate portrayal of the Social Security problem and his proposal or has he been somewhat misleading? Problem? What problem? Ted Kennedy said there was no problem. Somewhat. Don't phunk with my mind, Rock the Vote!

The next few questions are for statistical purpose [sic] only to help us better understand this survey.

A lot of people are unable to get out and vote for many reasons. Did you happen to vote in the November 2004 election for president? Yeah, I was just happening to be out that day, and just happened to walk past my polling place, and just happened to stand in line to just happen to punch the ballot.

Oh yeah, we need to know your race and religion too, and how often you attend religious services ... you know, to help us understand this survey.

Yes, you do need help understanding surveys, don't you?

Court Rules Against File-Sharing

This pisses me off. If the Supreme Court manages to shut down file sharing services, how can I fully enjoy my Constitutional right to create and distribute virtual child porn?

Train of Thought

Overheard on the commuter train home this afternoon, as two boys of 14 or so finished discussing dodge ball and turned their thoughts to disabilities:

"Would you rather be blind or deaf?"

"Deaf."

"How about being blind and deaf?"

"That would SUCK!"

...long pause...

"Do you ever sleep on your trampoline?"

Discount Dream Analysis for Dummies, Chapter 1

Two nights ago, patient dreamed he was back in his home town (the reason for this is unknown), walking westbound alongside road bordered by abandoned industrial buildings. Leg numb and battling high winds, patient decides to double back to building where he has parked his car. Upon returning to parked car, car has transmogrified into a wheelchair. Patient, now limping, folds wheelchair and carries it alongside same road. Patient finds bus stop in abandoned alley piled with litter -- so much that he has to climb pile of compacted garbage (with leg only semifunctional) to reach bus stop. (Patient reports that his right leg was numb upon awakening, indicating influence of biofeedback on dream state.)

Last night, patient again dreams of returning to his home town, and is now driving up a steep back road entrance to his high school. Suddenly the road is coated with ice, and patient struggles to reach summit. Upon reaching the school parking lot, patient turns onto exit road, which again is steep and icy. Patient tries to regain control by steering into grass alongside road. Car, possibly abandoned, disappears, and patient slides out of control toward brick wall below.

Recommended course of action: Go ahead and order burled walnut trim on Lexus.