Don't Burn Your Hand, Al

Someone do tell the former vice president that's just a globe he's holding; the actual planet is much larger and more complex.

The proportions do serve as a handy infographic to measure the size of the man's ego, though.

From the cover of this week's Free* Times.




*Free as in corporate-sponsored, formerly by an out-of-town media conglomerate free.

A Hypocrite and a Pussy

From Contact Music, home of all things irrelevant:

Campaigning RADIOHEAD frontman THOM YORKE has confessed he is a hypocrite, because it's impossible for him to be a world-travelling rock star without damaging the environment. Yorke is a vocal ambassador for the charity Friends Of The Earth, but admits he isn't "flawless", since big concerts, tours and festivals rely on fossil fuel and create tons of unrecyclable waste.... That stresses me out, because I am a hypocrite. As we all are."

No, you are. I don't preach to others about "global warming" from my bus seat.

Stressed out, freaked out... what a spokesman.

...Oh, and 'Garfield 2' is a 3-Star Movie

Roger Ebert reviewing An Inconvenient Truth:

It represents, I believe, agreement among the world's experts. Global warming is real. It is caused by human activity. Mankind and its governments must begin immediate action to halt and reverse it....

These facts are stated by Al Gore in the documentary "An Inconvenient Truth."

Roger Ebert responding to his readers who question this truth:

I cannot get into a scientific discussion here. There will be no end to it. All I can say is, the Gore documentary made a deep impression on me.

Just how deep an impression? What do you suggest we do?

Save energy in our houses. I did a funny thing when I came home after seeing "An Inconvenient Truth." I went around the house turning off the lights.

No shit? I usually turn them off before I leave. But every little bit helps, right? But what about Gore himself? Isn't he the guy who "flies around on a jet to warn against [global warming]?"

Yes, one of thousands of jet flights every day.

But, um, as long as we turn off the lights on those thousands of jets, we'll be OK?

And you said you didn't want to get into scientific discussion.

Set Phasers to Stunning

National Review Online is enjoying great success with its Star Trek fundraiser, so in the spirit of Mark 12:41-43 I offer...

AMOK DERB: