Won't Someone Think of the Elephants?

For a country that prefers its elephants crucified rather than worshipped, we sure do love those big smelly things. Sick of Google's liberal shenanigans, I recently signed up with GoodSearch, which promises to donate to the cause of your choice. Apparenlty the Lupus Foundation will now get .000001 cent every time I do a search for nude photos of Jessica Alba. But the big winner, according to Good Search's "success stories" sidebar, are the elephants:

• The Elephant Sanctuary, $2,260
• St. Jude Children's Research Hospital, $920
  
• Save Darfur, $820
  

Which leads me to believe that either Brit boy band has-been Lee "What About Whales?" Ryan is more influential than I thought possible, or Kim Basinger is running non-stop online queries in search of her career.